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July 25, 2008

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Nothing to add to the above comments. I enjoy your stories. Thanks

A couple of days ago an oncologist gave me some very bad news about my recently discovered cancer. I was aware that he was in emotional difficulty but so very much appreciated that, even so, he didn't flinch from complete honesty with me. In any crisis I tend not to be emotional, just very interested in learning all I can to resolve or mitigate or decide how I'll live with something, but I've always had a keen appreciation of those who are visibly easily touched by others' problems, as this doctor was. I am, too, as a matter of fact, but usually tuck the emotions away completely as I try to figure out how I can help. I am concerned that in this area to which I've recently moved there seems to be a great reluctance among the medical community to prescribe effective doses of effective pain killers. I've never needed them in my long life, but suspect I will be longing for them very shortly.

Sometimes, people ask me how I do what I do, and on some days, I don't know. I am glad that you see the people behind the diagnoses: the man who needs to die in peace, the love affair that will continue. For some reason, many in health care find it difficult to be around the dying cancer patient. I still haven't figured that one out. The people behind the cancer are the reason that I feel privileged to be a part of the journey, even when the journey ends in death.

should have been:*not in a "I'd mourn or them" way

Mmmmh, I'm sure you do good work, but I'd like to know how you keep going, or even keep work and private life separate when you are always so moved? I'm pretty sure that I couldn't keep up with that, so I'm glad I can keep my distance to patients, sure I'm nice to them, but in a "I'd mourn for them" way ... just see too many for that I think.

Thank you for taking time to share this story.

My father died of metastatic colon/liver cancer 9 years ago and I am so thankful that his hospice nurse was 'brave' enough to get an increase in his PO morphine so that later that night when he died he went in peace instead of agonizing pain.

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